A Way In -- Finally

First of all, I have to quote one of my favorite lines of all time.

"You're gonna need a bigger boat, right?"

--Roy Schieder, Jaws

LOL -- I love this movie. I can't say it enough. His expression when the shark pops out of the water is soooo classic, and I crack up every time he repeats a variation of the above line. So Good. It was on tonight while I was writing -- hard to pay attention to work, but I somehow managed. (g)

Okay -- on to other topics.

I didn't get a single word written last night. Not a one. I was so stressed out about this whole writing from an outline thing, I think I let it get to me. What if I can't do this? What if...what if...what if. I kept thinking 'I'm going to let D.A. down. I can't do this.'

Now, I can't say I've completely convinced myself otherwise, but I am feeling better tonight. LOL. I finally just said, 'Jen, you can only do your best. If for some reason it doesn't work out, you'll live. BUT, you must remember that your little freak out moments are normal for you -- get over it and move on!'

That little pep talk, as well as some encouraging words from a beta today, got me moving. Yes, I have an outline -- yes, I need to stick to it, but it's not written in STONE. There's room for me to change some things up -- and I need to let the story bend when it needs to. Must remember that!

So, I sat down tonight with this in mind and managed to get my 1700 words. I may still continue after this post -- for some reason, things are very clear for me tonight. LOL. I also worked out another thread of the book--making it better than what I had planned in the outline. And, I must say, I think I wrote a pretty kick-ass scene tonight. With this progress, I actually feel I CAN do this. I just needed to find my way back into the book -- I think I have. Granted, that doesn't mean there won't be bumps in the road, but it did wonders for my confidence.

Oh, and I'm definitely back to chunking. I don't know why it works for me, but when I chunk write, later scenes in the book help bring earlier ones into focus. I'm able to see where I need to bring the book -- and ideas begin to sprout. "If this happens at this point, I'll have to do this earlier," and so on. Hey, it works for me -- and that's just the way it is. I'll try to stick to the same area of the book for now, but if something hits me from the ending, that's what I'll write. It may take me longer to get the next set of pages finished, but I can't argue with a process that works and that which will make the final book better.

Ahhh, I feel so much better. (g)