Sunday, September 2, 2007

The Wolf Man Saves The Day!

I've been pretty quiet the past couple of days...if you hadn't noticed. The reason for this has been a continued "down in the dumps" mentality when it comes to my writing. I wouldn't normally talk about this on a public blog, but I figure I'm not the only one who goes through it. Maybe it will help someone else. You never know.

As my friends can attest to, I tend to run in cycles. I can go on for some time, quite happily in fact, just doing my thing... writing writing writing... loving what I'm producing, enjoying the process, thinking life couldn't get any better. Then something happens and I CRASH... It could be a negative response to a snip, it could be a lack of response to a snip, which makes me think people hate my stuff -- it can sometimes even be a postitive crit that brings it on. I have no clue why it happens, but I start thinking my writing is complete crap and that there's no way in the world I'll ever be published.

It's very debilitating, and puts the brakes on whatever creative flow I had going at the time. Sometimes it lasts for a few hours....sometimes a couple of days... Gah, it sucks.

I've mostly learned how to cope when it happens. My friends will kindly tell me to stop whining and get back to work.... or as one friend said last night, "You don't have time for this!! Stay positive, damn you!!" LOL. Truer words were never spoken. I DON'T have time for these bouts of self-doubt...but alas, they happen despite whatever efforts I make to shake them off.

So, what have I been up to? I've been trying to make myself write, and failing miserably. I think part of it has to do with that big snafu in FI--which I still haven't found a satisfactory solution for.... and well, I just haven't had any motivation to put my butt in the chair. I've been watching a lot of movies... lol. I've also been reading Gabaldon's LORD JOHN & THE BROTHERHOOD OF THE BLADE... (Notice I haven't mentioned homework. (g))

Tonight, I decided to snoop through the 'watch now' choices on Netflix. I came across The Wolf Man with Lou Chaney. It's on my at home queue, but I thought I might take a quick peek. Great movie, btw. And SHORT... 69 minutes, which is just weird. (g) Anyway, I've always been a big fan of the old creature features, but I'm not sure I've ever seen this particular one. I've seen all the cross-monster ones -- Wolfman meets Frankenstein, etc... LOVE em.

Anywho--I'm watching the movie and all of a sudden a scene starts to develop in my head -- for BTPM. Nothing really based off the movie, but one in which the movie plays a part. I think it has a lot of potential, and I'm super excited to get started on it. I also figured out what to do with this one chapter opening that's been giving me a lot of trouble. Basically what I had wasn't really necessary anymore (after all the changes I made to the front end), but I couldn't figure out anything to put there. Now I have at least an idea -- just have to flesh it out a bit.

So, YAY... I'm finally breaking through this horrible funk. A shame because it wasted a perfectly good weekend... but what can you do? At least I have one day left.

12 comments:

Precie said...

I so feel your pain (my last bout of self-doubt lasted for several MONTHS). I'm so glad to see you've found new inspiration! Have fun!

Jen said...

Precie,

Oh goodness, that must've been rough. For curiosities sake, how did you pull yourself out of it?

And thanks...I'm not out completely, but definitely getting there. :)

Jen

Precie said...

My sarcastic answer: upping my Paxil dosage (cured a variety of convergent emotional ills, actually).

My non-sarcastic answer: I'm still experiencing self-doubt about my original WIP1...so I let it sit and just add to it when I feel motivation.

But I did two things:
1) I started reading voraciously. Lots of fiction...long and short.

2) I started carrying a small notebook in my purse and jotting down random ideas as they hit me--not necessarily about WIP1 but just about any story. That's how WIP2 came up. And then WIP3 was inspired by a real-life spider that chose our deck for its new home. In fact, I think I'll write a post for my blog about how that inspiration took shape.
http://pmas-fiction.blogspot.com/

So now...I'm just sort of keeping myself open to random ideas and asking what I could do with them. :)

Jen said...

Precie,

Thanks for sharing! I try to do both of those, too -- reading a lot, especially when I'm in a slump, and carrying a notebook around with me at all times. A friend recently got one of those tiny digital recorders... hmm, thinking about it. (g)

Glad to hear you're at least making headway -- and I think your first wip has a lot of potential, so don't give up on it!

Jen

Precie said...

Jen--

Thanks! Don't worry...WIP1 is just a different type of grape...it needs more time to develop and mature. You've only seen Caitlin and Basia...possibly Marissa too. But I haven't even figured out entirely how their stories intertwine. Thanks again for the vote of confidence!

DH has suggested I carry a digital recorder...I just worry that my ideas, coming out of my mouth, will sound stupid. D'oh!

Jen said...

Precie,

Oh girl, I hear ya! I hate my speaking voice when I record it. When I was UC, I HATED listening to playback -- I always sounded like a complete fool, acting drunk or high, and doing a terribly poor job of it. I'm surprised no one caught on. (G)

As for wip1 -- I just wanted to mention that I find Caitlin very sympathetic. IF only because of how she denies herself basic human emotions. Thought I'd speak up because I saw a couple of people say the opposite. (g)

Jen

Precie said...

Jen--

LOL at the voice recording! I should have mentioned earlier that I have the voice of The Chipmunks...or perhaps Minnie Mouse.

And thanks re: Caitlin. I confess I'm not especially sympathetic to her. But when she wants to, she speaks to me loud and clear. :) It's nice to know that not everyone is completely turned off by her.

Jen said...

Precie,

Well, for me, I've always been a bit self-conscious after several male friends intimated that I had a voice made for phone sex services. (g) I couldn't disagree more, btw. (g)

As for Caitlin -- she definitely has a voice.

Jen

Claire Gregory said...

Bleggh, try four years! LOL

The big writing slump sucks. You just need to activate the inner cheerleader, the one with the really quiet voice who hides behind your amygdala waving her pompoms and telling you you're great.

And in lieu of that, you've got us. And personally I'd fight all the way for you and your writing- sign petitions if necessary. I'm serious, your characters are compelling and your stories have punch- you'll get through anything else.

I've got a spare spot just waiting on my bookshelf...

Precie said...

Jen--LOL at your alternate career opportunities!

Claire--FOUR years. Don't make me cry. You're a great role model for perseverance and dedication, and you're a great writer. Keep it up!

Jen said...

Claire,

OMG...four years?! Wow, I'm so happy to see you pulled yourself out of that!

And thank you!! If I have my way, you'll need several spots. ;)

Jen

Jen said...

Precie,

Yeah...kinda brings a tear to your eye, don't it? My mom would be so proud...

Jen