One More!

Only one more final -- at noon tomorrow, this semester will be behind me. WOOHOO! Too bad I'm sooooo exhausted. LOL. I need a nap in the worst kind of way and I'm due back at school in about a half hour. Blah. Oh well -- gut it out, almost finished.

I had a wonderful ephiphany about FI the other morning. Sometimes in the wee hours of the morning -- when I'm not exactly asleep or awake, I often have really wonderful lightbulb moments. The clarity I experience is amazing during those times -- the biggest problem is actually remembering things later. LOL

Anywho, I figured out how to reconcile some of my current stuff with a suggestion D.A. made. I'm so happy -- it allows me to keep some of my favorite scenes. So, YAY. I'd tell ya more, but I wouldn't want to spoil it. ;)

OMG...I can't believe I have a final that starts in 14 hours. Okay, I'm off to catch a catnap.

Three More Days

Yes, I'm counting down now. It's been so long since I've written anything that it seems like I can't even remember how to go about it anymore. I feel a bit disconnected from it all. Does that happen to you when you're forced to step away from your wips and characters? I hate it. I think it might be part of the reason I've been grumpy the past couple of weeks. I miss the satisfaction of seeing a scene unfold beneath my fingers. That sense of accomplishment and pride you get after struggling with a tough scene...or watching it flow across the screen almost on auto-pilot.

I think it's true that you need to write every day -- I certainly would if I could. There's nothing worse than feeling that connection to your work disappear -- almost as if you'll never be able to get back in the minds of your characters, etc. I've had to step away before -- heck, I don't think I wrote much my first semester of school -- but it's always hard for me to get back in the groove. Frustrating. Soo frustrating. (g)

The wonderful thing is that I'll walk out of my last final around noon on Tuesday and then I can concentrate on finishing the last bits of BTPM and _really_ start thinking about revisions to FI. Oh, it will be lovely. :) I am taking classes this summer, but the first one doesn't start for about a month. So, I have a lot of time to write/revise, etc. I prolly need to get a job, but hopefully I can get away with only working part-time. It's a toss-up -- being somewhat poor, but having time to focus on my MS's. Hey, I'm willing to make that sacrifice right now. :)

*deep breath* Two more finals...I can do this.

Sisters

The two pups are now acknowledging the existence of each other -- without the constant head humping. Granted, they still have their tiffs...but it's going much better now. Anywho -- They went to the groomer today and look how CUTE they look!

Oh...and a friend pointed out that Chloe looks sad. She's really not. LOL. She'e never liked cameras.




Bailey and her ears!




Awww, Chloe is still near and dear to my heart.




SIDE BY SIDE!! *yay*




Someone take this camera away from me! Couldn't resist this one of Chloe sleeping. LOL.

*blinks* It's My Birthday!

I totally forgot. LOL. That's pretty funny. I guess it's only natural when my big day falls during finals... How wrong is that? All kinds, I tell ya!

Anyway -- I'm gonna have a lovely day. (Uh, no) I have to finish up a takehome exam that's due at five o'clock... but after that, I'm heading out to dinner with the family. So, that should be fun. Just wish I would've finished the exam earlier...but you know me. (g)

Hope everyone has a lovely day! Ugh...it's rainy and clouded over here. Figures. (g)

When It Rains, It Pours

I've had a crazy week, with today taking the complete cake. LOL. Bailey is SUCH a handful. While I was in the shower today, I could hear both dogs barking their heads off. When I came out of the bathroom, I could still hear Bailey, but her bark seemed....muffled. She was outside!! That little pup figured out the dog door already. I know that seems natural, but let me tell you...it took a long time to train Chloe to use the thing. We really didn't think Bailey would figure it out without our help. But she did. Not five minutes later, I discovered her on top of my aunt's dresser. *bangs head on wall* She's nuts. LOL. The good news is that Chloe is finally accepting her into the house. I was worried for a while there -- she wasn't eating, which is how she behaves when she's upset or "all nerved up." But she's eating now...so YAY.

Anyway - my good news is that I just received another full request. *yay!* This one was completely unexpected, so it feels like a bonus. LOL. And Thank God...she wants it via email. Easy peasy, nice n' easy.

Promised Pics

Okay, I hope this works. (g)

Here's a close-up of Bailey. I've nicknamed her Wookie. LOL.




Okay, here is the source of the Wookie nickname. Check out those ears! I highly doubt she has _any_ control over them. They're all over the place, and behave completely willy nilly.




Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!




Here's Chloe...My pup.
Can you read her mind? Yeah, she's thinking, "This is BULLSH*T!"




After much head humping for dominance, Chloe (right) and Bailey (left) pass out. Hey, I'm just glad they're willing to lay next to each other. (g)





I had to add one more. One thing I've noticed is how Bailey follows Chloe around the whole day, and tends to mimic what Chloe does. Case in point. (g)

It's A Girl!

I'm pleased to announce the newest member of my household. Her name is Bailey, she's about 17 lbs. of over-the-top, nutty as all get out, furball energy. We have no idea what kind of dog she is -- a terrier mix of some sort. Her face reminds me of a pomeranian, though. Anywho, we drove about 100 miles (one way) to pick her up. I'm exhausted! Probably not the best way to spend the day before a final, but oh well. lol. It didn't seem right for me NOT to go.

Chloe and she are still circling each other -- well, except for when Chloe tries to hump Bailey's head. LOL. Yeah, Chloe is definitely the dominant one in this duo. Bailey is about 10 months old, and let me tell ya, that dog is all tongue. She licks _everything_... when she lies on the floor, she leaves wet spots. She's so fun, though -- she has these really crazy ears that _do not_ work in tandem. I'll try to snap some pics of her tomorrow.

Can I just say there are only 9 more days until I'm free for the summer?? Well, at least for a month or so. I _cannot_ wait to start working on FI. It'll be so nice. YAY...counting down the days and hours. :)

Passion

After promising myself I would study tonight, I couldn't resist the "meet and greet" glass of wine my uncle offered me at the opening of his wine tasting. Of course, that led into a second...to a third..and the next thing I knew, I found myself at the table with an extra place setting before me. Yeah, I'm terrible! But oh well -- it was a lot of fun and some excellent vino to boot! (Australian Shiraz's ...HELLO...good stuff)

As the bottles emptied, the volume raised in the room, and the next thing I knew, my uncle was announcing to the table how I'd sold my book to an agent. (VBG) Isn't that cute! (g) Anyway, the group was super excited for me, and who was I to set them straight? This lead into a conversation of what the book was about, how law school figured into the whole thing, etc. etc.

One of the women in the group waited for the table to clear...and then she leaned in and said in a conspiratorial whisper, "Writing is my secret passion. I've always wanted to do it!"

Me: "Then why haven't you?"

Her: "I'm 51 -- I'm way past that now! And I lack the talent."

Me: *utter shock* "If you want to do it, do it! Who cares if it's good? Who cares how much time you can devote to it? Just do it!"

Anyway -- the conversation really struck me for some reason. I can't imagine _wanting_ to do something, and just saying...No, I've missed my window... *blinks* I spent a good fifteen minutes trying to convince this woman (one of the nicest I've ever met) that if she wants to write, that she should. Even if it's only 15 minutes a day, a couple of hours a week -- it's something, and it's one step toward living the dream she's always had. I have no idea whether I had an impact on her, but I sincerely hope so.

The whole thing just reminded me how truly blessed I am to be doing what I love to do. I don't know if I'll ever succeed -- I don't know if my books will ever be read outside of my circle of friends... but at least I know that I gave it my all and that I won't ever look back and say I always wanted to do that but never did. At least I know I put my whole heart and soul into my passion. That's all that really matters.

It's Over!!

I just turned in my paper.. WHAT a relief. If only I didn't have a final looming on Monday -- this calls for a celebration. I'll probably take a nap instead. LOL. The worst part is that my aunt and uncle are hosting a wine tasting tomorrow night *cries* and I can't go cuz I need to study. WAH WAH WAAAAAHH.

Anywho -- one really cool thing about my paper (and yes, there really is only _one_ cool thing about it) is that I ran across a very familiar name in the process of doing research. My paper was about electronic publishing/new uses (meaning, the technology didn't really exist when an author entered their licensing agreement with their publisher for distribution of their book/s -- so now the courts are scrambling to figure out who owns the rights for ebooks, and any future technology not yet discovered.) Told ya -- boring. Anyway, DA gave a deposition in the case (I didn't have time to do more than skim), but I think he was talking about trade lingo/custom and what "a book" has been historically held to mean, etc. Hey, it's a talking point. LOL. So, DA...I read your deposition in such and such case... (g) Yeah, it's the exhaustion talking at this point.

OMG...I'm so happy that paper is turned in. It's complete crap, but it's in and I no longer have to stare at my pile of research. Maybe I'll burn it for closure. (g) Yeah...that would be nice...

Okay, yeah...need nap.

Sappy Romances

So, during a break yesterday, I flipped through some TV stations and ran across the movie adaptation of Danielle Steel's STAR. Oh man -- the memories that brought back! I, for whatever reason, loved that book when I was younger. I think it's because there's a singer featured in it and well, when I was a kid, that's all I dreamed of doing -- being on the stage, in the spotlight, singing for the world. Yeah, I was a sap. (g) I had high ambitions of being on Broadway -- that goal lasted until I was in college (as a voice minor who couldn't stand choir practice), but every now and then they spring back up when I see auditions being listed at the community playhouse, etc. Someday, perhaps -- for now, I'll content myself with the occasional go at the mic in a karaoke bar.

Anyway -- the point of my post. How in the world did I like that book so much?!? (g) I'm watching this movie, thinking to myself, this is C-R-A-P. (g) Don't get me wrong, everyone loves a good romance every now and then -- something to pass the time away under the sun, cheer you up, whatever. But, man -- STAR is just depressing. I found myself wondering why so many people choose to spend their hard earned cash on those books. I mean, the MC's are in love with each other, but it seems they always end up marrying someone else...staying with that person despite the availability of their true love, etc. I haven't read many Danielle Steel's -- maybe even just that one, but I've seen a couple of the movies. They're all the same. How does that happen??

I remember there was a discussion about these books on the writers forum I belong to -- someone posited the theory that they're like comfort food. Dependable. Hmm. I dunno -- to me, they're depressing. LOL. I hate seeing the two MC's spend years, sometimes decades apart, only to get together at the very end of the story -- when they're OLD and all kinds of used up. That's not romance, that's sad.

Okay -- anyway, I find this whole thing fairly ironic given the new book idea I have. LOL. I'll leave it at that.

FWIW -- I still liked the music in STAR -- despite Jenny Garth doing a horrible job at lipsynching. (g) You know, I think the book was better than the movie... Oh heaven help me. :)

Slight Panic Attack

Last night, in yet another attempt to put off that flippin' research paper, I allowed myself some time to think about the revisions to Faking It. So, with DA's recommendations in hand, I went through my chapters -- tried to view each scene with the mindset of whether it will move the main plot along... what can/should be cut, what could be merged with other scenes -- etc. etc. All I'm left with is wondering why he even likes this book to begin with. And so begins a full-fledged panic attack--leaving me wondering if I'll need to completely rework most of this book. It's not that I'm resistant to change -- it's just the thought of losing so many of my lovely little scenes--ones I worked so hard on--is a tough thing to face.

I'm blaming this reaction to the amount of stress I'm under, BTW. LOL. I'm tired, I'm worried about finals, etc. I know this will probably pass and I'll be able to look at the process more favorably. Right now, it seems like an insurmountable task. Instead of trying to rework this book, I'm wondering if it would be easier to pluck my characters out of this version and start over. But no, that's silly -- and my brain knows it. LOL. I just have to figure out a way of letting go of some these scenes. I also need to realize that I can come up with new ones--better ones. Yeah.

Okay, I'm taking a deep breath now. (g) I'm heading out to buy a lot of caffeine and sugary foods so I can work on my paper nonstop for the next two and a half days. I guess it's good -- inspiration always comes to me during stressful times -- maybe I'll come up with a solution to this dilemma.

What Inspires You?

With the bubbling up of my latest book idea, I got to thinking about that crazy thing called inspiration. I always find it interesting to hear people say they would love to write a book but that they can't come up with a good idea. For me, the idea formulation part of the process is the _easy_ part. I mean, I can come up with a million ideas just going to the mall and observing the nutjobs I run in to. (G) So, anyway -- I got to thinking about what inspired me to write my various wip's.

Child of the Mist was obviously inspired by the Outlander series. And NO, it's not fanfiction. LOL. I actually made a very concerted effort to distinguish it from DG's books. Whether I succeeded is another thing. (g) I read it now and I do a DOUBLE GAK at my poor attempts at dialect -- depending on when I wrote it, of course. LOL. It may be that first book that remains under the bed my entire life. But you never know - I do love my story and characters. It needs a major overhaul, though. Several friends are demanding I finish it _someday_ -- we'll see.

FAKING IT was obviously inspired by my own experiences with investigative work. My friends and family loved to hear my stories from UC and well, they always encouraged me to write a book. I actually thought maybe I'd write a nonfic book at some point, but heck, I'm not sure anyone would want to read that. Honestly, my experiences, while extraordinary to most people, would pale in comparison to most UC agents. So, fiction has allowed me the freedom to make things more interesting and HELLA funny. (g)

BY THE PALE MOONLIGHT is actually my first attempt to write according to market demands. I've always wanted to try YA -- mostly because I was a huge fan of Christopher Pike, etc. when I was younger. I read on an agents blog that werewolves were super hot, so I sort of melded an idea from when I was younger with a werewolves motif. Despite it's strange origin, it's become quite the book -- LOVE it.

Then I have my dream inspired wip's -- THE BRAEDEN and SHADOW WALKER. Both are straight from dreams -- with some elaboration on my part. Dreams are such a great source -- a dream also helped me flesh out COTM. My characters appeared and shed light on a gaping plot hole and introduced an entirely new character.

Then the latest idea from last night. Not ready to go into it yet, but I will say it was inspired by the Virginia Tech tragedy.

So -- what inspired you to write your particular genre/book, etc?

Inspiration

Inspiration truly comes at the strangest times. An idea for another book has bubbled up -- this one is a _whoa_ kind of story. The possibilities of where I can take it are simply amazing -- and I KNOW this book needs to be written. I hate to be a tease, but I need to keep this one close to the vest for a while. Mull it over. It's pretty much a departure from anything I've written before. I'm not sure if you'd term it a romance, but it definitely has those elements. Heck, it could be *gulp* literary. HEH.

Anyway, I've jotted down some notes about it -- even wrote the first couple of lines. It'll have to wait though... dang finals. WHY?? Why do ideas always bubble up when I need to hit the books?? My mind is a regular pro at the ole' procrastination thing. LOL. Even so, the inspiration that hits me during these times is fantastic. Without it, I wouldn't have BTPM under my belt...or FAKING IT for that matter. Yeah, I guess law school is good for some things. (g) If only I could bottle the stress at the end of a semester -- that stuff works!

Yep, Finals Are Coming

If there's one thing that's been true throughout my entire law school career, it's that the urge to write is the strongest when finals are drawing near. It's about that time, and man, I wanna write. (g) Last semester, I wrote 20K of BTPM two weeks before they began. Yeah, lol..I'm a master of procrastination. BUT, I will say I'm very productive at such times.

I posted an excerpt from The Braeden over at the writers forum and received some positive feedback. Of course, I want to work on it now. However, I need to do revisions of Faking It and I need to finish up the ending scenes for BTPM. It's a non-stop NEED to work on one of them when all I should be doing is studying. Blah. Finals are NO fun.

Anyway, I don't really have much to report -- just school, really. I'm plowing away at my paper -- which is due on Friday. And then my first final is the following Monday -- just a week away!! EEK.

Oh, and with all of the mounting stress, I decided to take a night off to spend with some friends who came into town unexpectedly last night. If you haven't seen "300" and you're a healthy female -- GO. Do not question it.. GO. (g) 300 well-built men in loin cloths for _two_ hours... need I say more?

Brainstorming

I haven't had much time to write -- or rather, I should say I haven't been in the right frame of mind. With everything that's going on, I'm finding myself slightly overwhelmed, which only causes me to shutdown on all fronts. But I have done a lot of thinking the past couple of days and mulling over the changes I'm thinking of making to FI. I'm actually warming up to the prospect the more and more thought I put into it.

It's a strange process. I haven't put anything to paper yet -- mostly just me thinking: okay, if I move this scene to the front of the book, it will help bring out this element and give it more punch. But then I have this gap in the back -- OH, but I could do this instead and then that stuff will work with a few minor tweaks, etc. It's pretty insane. LOL. But I've vowed to get a rough outline/sketch of everything to D.A. (dream agent) within 2-3 weeks. That way, once school is out I can hopefully have the changes nailed down and basically be left to the actual revisions/writing.

At any rate, that's where I'm at. Right now I'm switching into full school mode. Finals begin a week from Monday. (blech!) Oh, and I have some HORRIBLE news. I've signed up for two summer school classes. *cries* LOL. Well, hopefully it will work out okay. It's only 2 hours a day for 10 weeks (HEH) -- and with one class at a time, it shouldn't be too bad as far as homework goes. I should have plenty of time to write, etc. My only concern is whether I'll have to work throughout. That could pose a problem for time. But you know me, I'll work it out somehow. Hopefully, I'll get financial aid and it won't be too bad.

The Clarity That Follows

I've given a lot of thought to the suggestions The Agent made. I've talked to some writers in the know -- mulled it all over a great deal. I think I've come to an initial decision. I'm basically going to let my queries ride as they are now -- see if anyone pops up. However, I'm going to go forward with revisions. (with several saved copies of the original MS, of course. (g))

Yesterday, I was very overwhelmed by the sheer amount of things he wanted me to address. But with a little time, I've come to realize that I'm the one ultimately in control of the book. It's my job to stay true to what _I want_ and if suggestions can't be tweaked to fit the vision/tone I have for the book -- then that's something I'll have to deal with later. All I can do is address the things I think will work -- try to push others I'm a little more resistant towards and see if they work, etc. I'm very hopeful as I go forward. It's a huge undertaking, but hopefully in the end I'll have one killer book. I just need to remember that he loves my character -- so anything that would be unnatural to her, won't work in the end. Just have to walk the line and give it my Madison flair. (g)

Anyway -- thanks to everyone who jumped in to offer advice. I really appreciate it more than I can say. It's so wonderful to have your support. :)

The Call

You know how you worry you're going to be caught with toilet paper on your shoe when you meet a hot guy? Maybe have a sprig of broccoli in your teeth at that first kiss moment? Yeah, something like this was bound to happen to me. I got The Call -- it interrupted my well-deserved, much needed nap. Let me tell you, it's not easy to turn on the charm or brain when you're in a complete fog. LOL. Gak!

Anyway, the call went very well. There are too many details to go into right now, but he made some pretty heavy-hitting suggestions that will really change the face of FI. Some are easier to swallow than others...so right now, I'm just trying to let them all marinate.

The great thing is he understands I have finals coming, so isn't pushing me to turn in immediate revisions. He even suggested that perhaps I give him a rough outline as a jumping off point. That's probably the way I'm leaning, though I abhor the things like I'll catch the plague while writing one.

I'm a little confused about where we stand at this point. LOL. I was a bit overwhelmed by the entire phone call, so I'm still trying to sort it all out. This is basically what he said: He knows I have other agents looking at the manuscript. If someone tries to strike a deal with me, he wants to know ASAP so he can give his pitch. He doesn't believe we need any kind of agreement at this point, and that we can just move forward together. However, (and this is where I'm confused) if I get to the point where I feel I need something more concrete, we can do that. So, what do I do with that? Would it be fair to go back and say, I want to know we have a deal now -- just so I no longer have to worry about the agent search and all that implies? Or is it better to just leave it as is for now? Y'all know what I'm scared of -- I don't want him to lose that loving feeling. (g)

The general impression I got -- he wants to rep me.

Advice?

Slow Descent Into Insanity

I have absolutely no patience. I swear, this waiting thing is going to kill me. No word today...no email, no phone calls, nothing. *cries* Okay, I'm actually fine -- it's just that I'm in this perpetual state of readiness and I'd like to get started on revisions. LOL. Can't do that if I don't know what he wants...

But, with no word, I _will_ concentrate on school work tonight. I've vowed to at any rate. (g) No guarantees. I'm trying to tighten up the last couple of scenes of BTPM so I can send them off to my betas. It's a slow process because I'm completely in FI mode again. I'd rather work on that than homework, of course. But I'm down to crunch time, so we'll see.

At any rate -- I left my betas hanging, and I have a couple of them threatening to harm me. (g) Better get the ending to them soon. LOL. Always a good feeling to know they're invested enough to care.

*stares at her quiet email* Wah wah wah. LOL.

The Waiting Game

Unfortunately, today will not be the day of the phone call. LOL. He's out with a family emergency, so we'll be talking later this week. No idea when, but I hope it will be soon. Last night I could barely sleep with the anticipation -- can't take much more of this _not knowing_ business. (g) Oh well, perhaps I can finish up some other things in the mean time. (right!)

Anyway -- that's where things stand as of right now.

Advice Noted

Can I just say that my stomach is completely filled with butterflies as I wait for Monday to roll around? LOL. I'm having trouble sleeping and can't seem to concentrate on much. What a LONG weekend.

One really fun thing is how excited my family is all of a sudden. My family--love 'em--but they're not "dreamers." They're very 'salt of the earth' types -- work hard, pay your bills, no time for nonsense - sort of people. Up until now, my writing has been on the downlow. They KNEW about it, but it wasn't really discussed too much. Every now and then someone would ask me how my "writing thing" was coming along...usually after they make sure I'm studying enough and not using all of my time to write, etc.

My grandfather was so cute today. He _asked_ me about my book. It was the weirdest thing. Anyway, he gave me a very sage piece of advice. He looked at me, long and steady and said, "Just remember to take this one day at a time. Nothing's for sure until it happens." Amen! Thanks, Grandpa! (g) Then, after studying me for a VERY long time -- all the while, I can tell he wants to ask me _something_ -- he says, "How do you come up with ideas of what to write?" *giggles* Is that too cute, or what? Remember -- my grandfather is 85 years old. Bet he hasn't read more than the sports pages since he was in school.

Been getting tidbits of advice from other writers. I personally like the "remember he puts his pants on one leg at a time" comment. SO true and so easy to forget.

Anyone have anything else they'd like to offer? I have an entire day to kill. (g)

Update On Full Request

I have some truly wonderful news. No, I haven't signed with an agent, but dang it...this is almost as good. LOL.

I sent my full MS to the requesting agent on Thursday (yesterday!). A lot of stuff has happened since then, but basically he wants to discuss revisions with me. *blink* I have no idea what's going to happen at this point, but looks like there's _a_ phone call in our future. I'm super excited. He's a fantastic agent and he really seems to believe in my book and writing skills. He loves my MC and really gave me some great compliments after finishing the book (already!). He said I stood a decent shot at making it in fiction... so who the heck could ask for more? (g)

We also discussed BTPM, and perhaps a read of that is in our future. He's expressed an interest, but only after I give it the final spit-shine. Considering I'm just finishing, that's totally okay with me. Right now I have to get back into the FI frame of mind anyway.

He basically wants me to flesh out the plot dealing with the undercover stuff. I couldn't agree more. He said with a couple of more layers, etc. this could be really good. He's willing to invest his time in helping me, so I'm more than thrilled. Wow -- what a wonderful day! I'm mentally and physically exhausted from being on edge since I got the full request on Wednesday. Talk about things happening quickly! (g)

So...yay. More good news! :)

YAY!! *Happy Dance*

I just received some _excellent_ news. I've been asked for a full MS of FAKING IT based on a 50 page partial. WOOHOO!! Now that I've stopped squeeeing, I can email it to him. LOL. Just thought I would let y'all know, though. I'm so excited!!

Wait For It...Wait For It

I'm not quite finished. If you've been following my word count meter for BTPM, you'll see that I'm less than 800 words from my goal. HEH. Yeah, I'm gonna go over. I still have a couple of chapters to pull together, and the ending to write. I hope I can keep it down to only a couple of thousand over, but I'm not holding my breath. Oh well, hopefully when I go back through to tighten these chaps up, that count will fall some.

Anyway -- I pretty much wasted most of the day. It was so nice here and the outdoors wouldn't leave me alone. (g) I had to go play with the pup and just sit and enjoy the temp. So, that meant a _very_ late start on work. Oh well, I wrote about 2200 new words today. Considering I had no idea (really) of what I would write, I'm happy with the solutions I came up with. Honestly, it should go pretty fast from here on out. I have to finish one small scene...and then it's pretty much a straight shot to the end.

Here's hoping tomorrow is the day! (g)